Seat Treats

Because we are not four legged creatures and gravity is a bitch, us bipeds need to take a load off and rest our tushies now and then. Small wonder, then, that there is nothing more reimagined, recycled and redesigned than the humble chair.

per ranung chairs

(Per Ranung)

But chairs are not content to be merely functional; they are the shoes of the furniture world. You can't have just one pair -- oh no. If you're like me, you can't even walk into a thrift store without picking up a stray or two, because who can resist a sad, lonely chair with good bones, just begging for a spit shine and new fabric? Evidence of my obsession lives throughout the house. And the garage. And the shed out back. And now that I am stuffed to the gills with chairtastic finds, I get busy convincing my friends that they need such and such chair. It is a disease, I tell you.

So while I may not have a spare square inch left for these beauties, I though I'd share some sweet fantasy finds with you guys. Who knows? Maybe you could provide a good home for these fellas.

jugen bey

Jurgen Bey is a master of transformative chair design. He takes a simple, recognizable form and ratchets up the crazy a notch or two with this chair designed for his Fitness Flat exhibition. You know you want grandma to crochet you a snake coozy for your dusty shaker chair, don't you?

jurgen bey suzy hoodless

Bey is also responsible for the cultured neanderthal look shown in this Suzy Hoodless designed room. The Tree Trunk Bench costs $15,700, but let me tell you a secret: it's just a log with some chair backs stuck on it. Who wants to make one and send us the pics?

fredrik farg

Fredrik Farg gave these classic shapes a glamorous boost with dressy details. Thrift store finds were reupholstered with suiting details and me likey.

owi chair

(OWI)

This ain't no hollaback chair -- this beauty was destined to be noticed on the initial cruise through the store and will always have first pick of admirers. Mmmm, her purple tufted wings make my heart sing with lust. I can think of a few chairs I'd kick to the curb to make room for her, but shhhhh, don't let them know just yet...

jaime hayon

You can't talk hot chairs without mentioning Jaime Hayon. Homeboy knows how to tweak a form to bring out the best in chairness.

jaime hayon red chair

He also knows how to pimp the goods, like this slutty red chair he designed for Camper. Hello, sexy!

stephen randazzo

(Stephen Randazzo)

While I appreciate and desire chair bling, a well designed form will always be on point, much like a classic piece of sculpture. Old school boyz Bertoia and Eames knew a thing or two about how to make a lasting impression.

tom scheerer

And sometimes the right chair is like the perfect piece of jewelry. This home photographed by Tom Scheerer isn't really my style, but that El Greco-esque attenuated chair takes the whole room to another, edgier level. What I wouldn't give for a set of six of those babies...

droog cowhide chair

But, of course, I will always be drawn to the weird and unattainable, like this Cow Chair designed by Niels van Eijk, via Droog Design. I don't think I'll be getting one of these anytime soon unless someone slaughters a cow and sends me the entire hide in one piece. I'm pretty sure I can take it from there.

mona lisa chair

And then there's this. It's a frame! It's a chair! It's my butt in the Mona Lisa's face! Somehow that doesn't seem quite right. What do you think?

coin chair johhny swing

On the other hand, I feel pretty confident that this Coin Chair by Johnny Swing is a solid investment. Welded from 1500 half dollar coins, it costs a mere $59,000. Yes, that is more than $58,000 in profit for the artiste, but humor in the face of a mounting recession is priceless, right? Right.

It's Getting Gold in Here

Since Karly's gone, I thought I would do my best to gold up this hizzy in her honor. Goldeness may be next to Godliness because it's all about surface, so it only take a cheapo can of spray paint to turn even the most ordinary object into something that looks expensive and klassy. If the recession depression is getting you down, hustle out and spend $5 to give something the Midas touch. You know it's going to make you feel better. I'm here to help you pull the paint trigger with some scintillating finds that are designed to bring the bling back into your life.

marcel wanders

Zany Dutchman Marcel Wanders contradicts the age old aphorism that, "You can't polish a turd." Well, apparently you can!

richard powers

Richard Powers

Boyfriend's big black speakers getting you down? Surely he wouldn't mind a bit if you got after those nasty cases with some super shiny lussssster. Tip: wait until he goes out on a late night bar crawl to transform his AV equipment. Men can get a little touchy about their electronics, so best to let him booze it up a little. High Five sure to follow!

demarkersvan

Once your golden piece de resistance is finis, you may want to protect it from his angry adoring clutches with a fabulous fence. Demakersvan makes gorgeously crocheted fences out of plastic coated wire in a variety of designs, including this golden girl.

gold guerrila art

While you've got the paint out, why not take a cue from these guerrilla artists and put gold back on the streets. Oh, and please start at Wall Street...

gold atm

Because we surely need some gold back in our banks! This gold painted ATM is probably worth more than the "money" inside it.

studio job

Speaking of gluttony and financial ruin, Studio Job has got those bank bitches' number with their piece, Robber Baron. Holy crackatoly, do you see the tiny guns, atomic stars, airplanes, and other symbols of technology gone horribly awry? I desperately need this as a coffee table. Since this piece costs more than a bank (which isn't that hard these days), I'll be busy trying to figure out how I'm going to make this myself.

per ranung

Per Ranung

While I try to reinvent the wheel, I think anyone could handle this as an at home project: whip out the paint can to emphasize va-va-volume in sculptures. Glossy surfaces always look rounder than matte ones. Let the model instruct you on how best to apply this rule to your fashion decisions.

rebecca duke

If you accidentally get some paint on the floor, don't worry! Just go ahead and spread it everywhere. If Dolce and Gabbana can have a solid gold bedroom, so can you.

gisele ganne

gisele ganne

Perhaps you'd prefer something more precious and smaller in scale, like these rings from jewelry designer Gisele Ganne's Divorce series. Just slip on these gold knuckles and leave a lasting impression on your significant ex's face.

ricochet designs

I also love that Ricochet Studio isn't afraid to take a golden shower. I really covet Accident for my little boy's nursery because -- as the designers themselves acknowledge -- it happens.

ricochet designs

Ricochet makes all kinds of oddly twisted ceramics with a golden flourish, like this Urn with an intestinal interior. Love these guys. Found via Sara Says Awesome's quirky blog.

For fine details like those on the Ricochet pieces, may I recommend you dispense with the spray paint and switch to Rub 'N' Buff, the most amazing product in the universe. No, I do not get paid to advertise their wares, but I should (wink) because I have covered everything from frames and knobs to thrift store junque to all manner of TJ Maxx and Ross' craptacular "goods" with the Buffer. You will be amazed at how much a tiny tube will cover.

Like, I'm pretty sure the artist responsible for this travesty could have saved himself a whole lot of money:

gold kate moss

Yes, Mark Quinn's solid gold Kate Moss statue has an estimated worth of $10 million pounds. It probably would have cost less to buy Miss Moss herself and coat her and her naughty bits in Rub 'N' Buff. After all, odds are that it would only take one tube to do the whole job.

Come Along and Ride on a Maptastic Voyage

8 million years ago I wrote a post on my map fixation, and you all seemed to agree that maps rule the world. Well, don't spend too much time fixating on how I brilliantly used language and the internets to write something long before the Big Bang, because part deux is coming at all you map lovers bright and early this morning. Set your international time clocks to awesome and let's get this globe trotting. Now I could do my usual patter that goes something like: maps... globalization... maps... economy... maps... self deprecating political joke. But in my own little latitude x longitudinal coordinate, pollen is dripping from the trees in our canopied neighborhood and making my life a living hell, so I'll settle for maps... pretty. That works, right?

sr gambrel

Interior designer, S. R. Gambrel goes nautical in this room decoupaged with maps. I'm a thinking this look can move beyond the solely sea worthy, though. Industrial glam would work equally well.

annie schlecter

Annie Schlecter makes this map retro fresh by adding a dash of Mimosa yellow to cool gray, dropping in a sprig of shiny pendant goodness, pouring in a heaping helping of shaggy delight, and garnishing with a burl wood cross section that acts like nature's own growth chart. Delicious.

per ranung

Per Ranung

This humble little map pirouettes on center stage like a prima ballerina in this... boy's (?) room. Whatever. I'm keeping the metaphor. Boys can dance, too, right?

map quilt

At night, little Billy Elliot in training could cover up with an amazing map quilt by Leah Evans. This beauty is already sold, but you should check out her other work which walks the line between symbol and abstraction with stunning intricacy.

map wall

OWI

This Belgian architect couple spends six months out of the year traveling around Europe in a very swank mobile home, and the other six living in a garage they've tricked out with various and sundry creature comforts. A map is a must for planning future journeys.

globe

Here they show off their essentials: Ligne Roset's Togo sofa, kitchen appliances, a picture of their beloved camper, and the ever popular globe.

globe lamps

Speaking of globes, check out what this crafty chica did to hers. One whole makes two halves (and a very cool pair of pendant lights).

map covered chair

Here's another nifty idea for all your peeps unafraid of a little glue, courtesy of The Bedlam of Beefy's funny blog. Based in the UK, online retailer All Things Original stocks their virtual shop with tons of cute and quirky selctions. Good thing the interweb makes hopping across the pond nothing more than a skip and a jump.

gavin turk

This incredible TEXTILE by Young British Artist (YBA) Gavin Turk hits all those political notes I alluded to but am too lazy to actually cover in this post. The map is fashioned from bits of commercial packaging that reflect the increasingly global nature of consumerism. What's most important is that Coca Cola is available in Uzbekistan, right? Insert your own analysis here.

domino

Nope. Not the same house as the first image, but just goes to show that great minds think alike. Courtesy of the now defunct Domino, via Alicia B. Designs.

tokyo map

Say hello to my current obsession: maps of Tokyo designed by cartographer extraordinaire, Hajime Ishikawa. This little gem is even conveniently featured in chartreuse and turquoise, a hot color combo discussed here and here. Its veiny rivers and jagged arteries set my heart to double pump!

Mmmmm... topolicious.