Sorry for the late post today everyone, I had quite the whirlwind evening last night. After trying out a new Indian restaurant and going to see the Yelle concert, I made my way home to watch a late night taping of Top Design. Despite the fact that I didn't have a drop to drink, I still feel like I blacked out through the lobotomy inducing design show. Let me try to remember what happened. Yes, yes, It's coming to me: Opening montage of the winner and looser for the week so that we can start to feel their story. The challenge is given: take an ugly office, use some recycled crap and green standards (read: something we can pretend you messed up later when the producers decide that you are no longer entertaining) to make a small office that our cameras can't quite fit into look nice.

Step two: Once you've planned your design and are SO SUPER EXCITED to prove how great you are on your own, abandon ship and take over someone else's project so that there's virtually no hope that anything will look good and everyone will have hurt feelings about taking credit for other people's ideas (more on that later) Let's stop with all the paragraphs and look at the design train wreck (drain wreck?)

Abort, Natalie! Abort!

she never listens. And pray tell, why are the judges just now picking up on her lack of sophistication? Everything she does looks like it was made for a homecoming queen's self decorated bedroom.

OH NO!!! It's the room that (stomping feet) Eddie totally stole from Nathan. Gosh, darn, it's just not fair.

Calm down now, let's get a few things straight: the producers are working overtime to villainize Eddie, pitting he and Nathan into an imaginary tete-a-tete to which we are respond with screams of injustice at our television set. Ok, seriously though, Eddie is kind of a bitch, but, what do you expect, he's got a big fancy design job that many would kill for. And he's good at it. Wouldn't it be SO MUCH WORSE if he were phony squeeky clean nice?

Plus the whole point of last night's event was to take credit for someone else's design, a sad attempt at inducing a blood curdling rage in our otherwise bored hearts. In 5 years of Project Runway, there has never been a "take over someone else's design" challenge. You know why? Because that would be stupid.

I'm sick of writing about last night show, it's making the hole in my skull bleed. Let's just look at the pictures and get it over with.

Oh, Preston, Preston, your room was so great. I think you're so wonderful, HOW did you ever think of painting that bookshelf. Ok, seriously everyone? Lame.

(side note, according to our stats, several people end up on our site after googling the following: Is Top Design Preston Gay?)

YES

I didn't totally hate what Ondine did with Wisit's table scraps. I kinda like that chair.

-Holy Crap my computer is going slow today, this is really just fueling my Top Design Rage-

Oh, Andrea, I REALLY REALLY want to root for you. Despite how annoying it is to CONSTANTLY hear you talk about your (shhhhh) secret marriage to childstar Ricky Schroder, there's something about you that I kinda like. Now GET. IT. TOGETHER. And, listen: no more desk chair cozies. Got it? Got it.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Nathan, did you hear what I told Andrea about the chair cozies?

Since we don't have Kelly to disect this week, we'll have to make do with India, who's outfit I was oddly drawn to, even though it reminded me of this Debra Messing get-up that I've never really loved. I think it may have been the colors. OH! now, a room in that pallet may actually be a contender for Top Design, but sadly, nothing this week even came close to vying for the position of Medium Design.

One last thing before I go: you know, I'm really starting to blame the production for this crap that is getting tossed across my screen once a week. Would you please just stop trying to squeeze every last bit of drama and name calling out of this event and give these designers a chance to really do something great. If they each had, oh, I don't know, say, a budget, and time, and a clear direction, not only might we finally see some good work, but I'm willing to bet that the level of jealousy and insecurity might raise to such a level that we would actually get to watch REAL drama, not this phony crap that you keep peddling.

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On an entirely different note, it is a little cooler in austin today (woo-hoo! 74 degrees!) so I treated myself to a hot chai from starbucks. It is magical and is making up for my top design sadness.

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Ha Ha, I just checked weather.com and it's actually 87 degrees. I think I'm so used to the insane heat that I thought it was in the mid 70s. Plus, my thermostat says 74, so, you know, I assumed. Anyway, just a nice, crisp, cool 87 degree day. Why am I telling you all this?