2nd Dibs

First of all, thank you for tuning in for the One Room Challenge series and sorry about the technical snafus brought on by extra traffic... I'm working on some hosting ch-ch-changes. Anyway, after spending six straight weeks cranking out decorating-as-spectator-sport posts, I'm still feeling a little frenzy whipped. The pace was INSANE. But the whole experience was super fun and I learned a lot and I also bought a lot of stuff along the way. When I say a lot, I mean I can't park my car in the garage anymore and my husband is pissed offus maximus. Let's review just a few fruits of my recent shopping labors, shall we?

If you follow me on instagram, then you already know I scored these vintage Italian arc lamps at Round Top a while back. My buying inhibitions were precipitously low on the day we hit the market so I have a smidge of buyer's remorse over a few things, but not these. I do need to call around and get some plating estimates, though. Anyone have experience with brass replating?

Whilst at Round Top I also bought this 80s painting by a Dallas artist that dealers kept going nuts for, but I can't remember his name and the vaguely legible signature is not helping me track down any info.

I do know that basking in the glow of that mustache might give me sunburn. I can tell this is a really good painting... wish I could figure out who done it. I also wish a new frame would jump up on that because birch wood is not doing the dude any favors.

Not content to buy just one (million) paintings, I also nabbed this Jenny Andrews Anderson jellyfish inspired masterpiece. Can't wait to get it in my house and figure out where "Abyss" wants to live. I keep selling all my good stuff to clients when they bat their cute little eyelashes, but this one is mine.

Meanwhile this picture is full of stuff I plan to sell. I already sold the needlepoints and you may recall that the cobras and black vase were employed in the service of my dinette reveal. I know someone out there desperately needs a giant brass boot vase... right? And I am dying to do a super chic moody kid room with those silly Master Simpson and Chums prints in them. I hope the child bearing world is listening to my pleas.

And then there's this. At a flea market I spied with my gimlet eye a filthy ice bucket... I'm not sure what turned my head, but I bought it and what do you know? It's a beat up Christofle piece designed by Luc Lanel in the 30s. The pits and dings were really bugging me for a while, but I'm starting to love the patina.

So to summarize, I have way too much stuff. This is not even a teeny tiny molecular fraction of the stuff that's wrapped up in the garage. Apparently I can't stop buying things "for clients," so I'm wondering if I should rent a storage unit? Would that make me a hoarder? Is it too late for that anyway? Should I open an Etsy shop? Would people buy my junque?

I even have one of these lying about. I have EVERYTHING.

Off to catalog and inventory the warehouse. Send in the jaws of life if you don't hear from me in a week.

That Time I Auditioned For an HGTV Show

Sorry for the light (to no) posting, but things be crazy up in here. As you may have oh so cannily surmised from my title, I've been a little busy doing things I swore I would never do. Things like trying out for a reality show that involves competing for money on national freaking tv. I must have huffed too much lacquer remover because that's just nuts... right? So, here's the scoop -- I spent a week of my life shooting self portraits and portfolio pictures and filling out MASSIVE ridiculous mountains of paperwork so that I could attend a local HGTV casting call for a house flipping show. Hilarious/not hilarious side story: I was almost done laying out 15 pages of said paperwork drama on a program I don't normally use when I left for literally five seconds and turned around to find Luke standing at my computer, playing it like a piano... 15 pages totally jacked up. Hahahaha kids are so cute. Sort of.

Anyway, head shots happened:

What? I didn't tell you that it's a team challenge? The plot thickens. So if we get on the show we have to renovate an entire house with no subcontractors. By ourselves. All of it. This is Matt, he's Karly's husband and he's a contractor. So basically my plan for world domination involves me bossing Matt around while he lays acres of teeny tiny tile in a herringbone pattern all over the walls, floors, stove... anything that will move. I can't wait for him to read this news!

So Matt and I head to the casting at a hotel with terrible carpet. I'm not very good at selfies or apparently even at the ubiquitous instagram foot shot, because it looks like I have cankles and there's a big ugly scab with a flashing filtered arrow pointing towards it. But check out that fugly carpet! I have photo priorities.

In between nitpicking the delightful decor we're just sitting there, assessing our competitors. It seems like virtually everyone but me has spent more than five minutes on their (very large) hair and makeup, and I bet nobody else got puked on that morning after arm wrestling a 13 month old all night for four hours of sleep. Other businessy people are setting up installations for clients. We are playing (and winning) iphone physics quiz. Did I mention priorities?

To make a long story short, we waited three hours for a three minute interview. We did our silly dog and pony show, and then we went home.

And got called back.

Fast forward to a couple of days later, when I still have not slept or ironed the tired wrinkles off my face. We are then subjected to an hour long interview under lights and camera with a pair of adorably adorable ladies. I'm pretty sure I aced that shit -- just being honest (I hope). I mean I could always always always do better but I think I interview well thanks to years of teaching and many more years spent talk talk talking at my husband. Meanwhile I have no idea what Matt said because they split us up and interviewed separately for a while... like at a police station. Hopefully he didn't mention the dead bodies.

So that's what's been happening. We should know in October if we will be famous and stuff. Wish us luck!

On another tv front, Little Miss Amy Hadley and her fancy YNN crew (or maybe just Jesse the camera dude) came over Tuesday to film another House Proud segment on rugs. My favorite!!!

I really wanted to take pictures of our house all blissfully clean and styled up, but I only had 2.2 spare seconds to shoot so this is what you get.

Can you say giant amazing lucite coffee table? Can you say it five times really fast?

Now say, Erin you're not too old to be on tv. Because apparently I have gone from shrinking violet to total fame whore. Soon I will assuredly become insufferable and direct all inquiries to my publicist, so please leave a comment now while you can.

You dudes rule.

In Which I Humiliate Myself, AKA Video of My Nursery Tour on House Proud

You know how sometimes you see pictures of yourself, or hear recordings of your voice, or -- you know -- see yourself on tv, and wonder how the pod people managed to take over while you were sleeping? You know?

ABSOLUTELY!

I suspect my parents will be confused when they discover I have transitioned from born and raised in east Texas to Jessica from Sweet Valley High (don't judge). Or maybe I always sound like that?! Either way, I need some elocution lessons.

Thankfully Luke is adorable and precious and pretty much steals the show. Plus Amy Hadley is utterly charming! If you live in Austin the segment will be airing on YNN today.

Enjoy the video and try not to hurl tomatoes at your screen.