slop design

Oh. My. God.  It happened.  Tonight was the apex:  everything that is right with television all came to a catty, designy peak right here in my living room.  PR. TD. ANTM.  Who is waging war against my psyche and trying to send me into overload?  Because this is a design blog, I'm only going to bother you with Top Design.  Erin already did a brazzilliant post, which I encourage you to read.  NOW  (see below).  This show is like an enigma wrapped in a riddle wrapped in a train wreck.  And, sadly, there are only a few sad pictures online.  Now, I've just recently moved out from under the rock I used to live beneath (read:  I've only had cable for 6 months) so I never saw TD1 in it's entirety but I do remember a hobgob of crappy rooms and piss poor construction, I justified this by limited time and budget, but PR designers bust out some bangin' stuff under similar conditions so really, there's no excuse for stuff like this:

ugly

could you honestly imagine standing in front of Kelly Wearstler  trying to justify a shadow box filled with peanut butter and beer?  According to Adler:  "Breaking the rules is fine, but first you have to know the rules"  Truer words were never spoken JA, never.  (frankly, that quote was the highlight of the episode)

Now, for our friends down under (I'm talking to you Raina) who don't get to cringe in embarrassment from week to week I will summarize another shadow box that I couldn't find a picture of:  It was filled with apples.  yes, apples.  In my humble opinion, shadow boxes are to be used on four specific occasions:

1. to display something sentimental

2. to display something stunningly beautiful

3. to draw attention to an everyday object that could be considered unconventionally beautiful

4. to start a small fire (my preference)

please note, an apple display did not fit into in any of the above bullet points.

Seriously?  These kids are the best of the best?  They all cried like a bunch of babies when given a budget of $2,000.  I thought, $2,000 + craigslist = my dream home.  There were a couple of small glimpses of brilliance (by comparison) but otherwise I was unimpressed, and, therefore, totally ready to snarkily enjoy the next few weeks.  My head is spinning.  

More disasters:

a shadow box with (oh la la) a new years theme.  

world's ugliest bedroom.  If I had a worst enemy, I would rescue them from this room.

how much pee do you think is on this sad couch?  Don't you just love how it's disproportionately paired with the original work of "art"?

To summarize, here are my love / hates:

Eddie:  emerges from the pack with his adorable traveling butlers pantry.  

India: familial coat tails?  Should I know her?  This really could be a me problem, educate me.

Preston:  You ain't foolin me with that first year art school shadow box.  Save the sad stories about personal tragedy for the kleenex endorsement you'll get after the show ends.

Jonathan: Wise and true

Natalie: b'bye nat I give you 2 more episodes, MAX

Santino:  SANTINO!!!!!  I can't wait!!!  I want to decorate a room for you, I promise to use Santino-face wallpaper just like you would want

Andrea:  how many times did you put your hubbie's name on your application miss "i'm going to make it on my own terms?"

Serge: It really wasn't your time to go, even with the crappy shadow box

Wisit: ixnay on the ingingsay.

The rest: no solid opinion.  

Stay tuned, so much more to come all season long

PS. remember to read erin's post, below.  I love her!