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I am obsessed with this picture I saw at desire to inspire last week:
I don't know if it's the mirrored wallpaper or the neon branches or the little stools or the wonderful screen print, but I MUST HAVE THIS somewhere in my house. I think it's the mix of tacky shit with live-able comfort, which is pretty much my go-to style.
Kids, drinking is wrong. But sometimes it is a necessary evil -- for example, when celebrating birthdays. And sometimes drinking leads one to fall out of one's chair, thereby bruising one's delicate derriere, although one might forget that it even happened, save for the twinges of painful reminders while sitting. Which generally occurs from the hours of 9 to 5. And oftentimes one does not sleep well after a night of imbibery, thereby ensuring that morning shall come too soon and the day shall be hellishly long. And writing is the LAST thing one wants to do, as all that type type typing disturbs the lovely silence, and also because the cursor is dizzying. Eventually one is forced to seek out flashy means of entertainment, as one has the attention span of a gnat. Behold:
Little Joseph candleholders by Qubus please one. One fantasizes about plugging Little Joseph's head hole with multicolored candles, and one laughs.
One also enjoys all kinds of piggy banks, but one is especially enthralled by this piggy bank cast from a real suckling pig. One has read that piggy died of natural causes, and also that $10 from the sale of each pig shall be donated to the Humane Society. That makes one happy.
Actually, as a general rule, one likes pigs, and one also covets Karly's gold panther platter tables, so why not a gold pig platter table?
Conflict! One cannot have two tables, and one LOVES gnomes. One may or may not have had a David the Gnome fetish as a child... One also finds it funny that Philipe Starck designed a gnome table.
One does NOT want this table, as one is totally offended by the idea that a "Blackamoor" (foolish term courtesy of the seller... one would never be caught dead saying such things) should be forced to carry cocktails. One feels that whomever purchases this table is a bad person. Not that one is judgmental, or anything.
One's agitation is soothed by these multiracial baby hand soaps. One likes the tiny baby fist that appears to say, "Fight the power!" in tiny baby sign language.
One very much DOES want this bust of Lenin covered in traditional Czech patterns. One never realized how Lenin's facial hair makes him look uncannily Satanic, but one is entertained by his creepy visage in juxtaposition with the pretty pretty flowers.
One feels better now.
My Friends Bryan and Hannah just bought a house, and, being the GENIUSES that they are, they contacted me ASAP to inquire about window treatments coverings. I hemmed and hawed over helping them. I mean, there are only a few nice things a girl can fit into her 100 mph lifestyle. Then I imagined, what if poor sweet Brian were to, say, fall victim to an injury and he had to, oh, I don't know, spend several weeks in a cast and wheelchair with nothing but a telescoping lens and Hannah's sketches and sandwiches to keep him company? Well, I really couldn't bear the thought of Brian suffering through such a tragedy without a beautifully dressed window to peak out of. So, I decided to be the bigger person and help the kiddos out by compiling this small collection of window goodness.
Oh, one last thing before we get started, and this is VERY important... whenever Erin and I advise a friend via the blog, it is your responsibility, dear readers, to take a shot every time we type their names. This is why we usually only help on Fridays. This week is bonus because there are 2 names: Hannah and Brian (shot! shot!) Hooray! Back to windows
My knee jerk reaction to any window dilemma is Roman Shades! I love them! I think it's because you get all the luxury of fabric but they're nice and crisp and tailored, not all flowy and showy. I just bought some lovely black and white striped fabric to make roman shades for my bedroom that will look similar to this:
Tracey Garet's home via Alkemie
I will forgo the silly wooden sculpture and the fancy wing-back chair. More Roman Shade Porn:
photo 1: Kelly Wearstler / photo 2: Muriel Brandolini via Desire to Inspire
The first picture shows that Roman shades really do have a decadent side, if you must. The second shows their all out sex appeal. Something about the sheer shade that creates texture and depth when it's folded is just oh so hot! I've never really been a big fan of combined window treatments, what does everyone think of the roman shade paired with the printed curtain?
(I'm sorry, I can't remember where I found this picture)
MMMM, naaaa, I don't think I like it.. what about you Brian and Hannah?
Photo by Paul Costello
If you're going to go with curtains, I say go with curtains. These neon yellow over-sized raw silk numbers were clearly hand stitched by the angels in heaven, carried down by little doves and installed by tiny baby kittens with golden paws. Clearly. I also REALLY LOVE when curtains are hung at the top of a wall, just below the ceiling, despite how tall the windows are:
photo courtesy of survive style 5's flickr photostream
Some people like floor to ceiling curtains so much, they just skip the walls altogether, I strongly advise this:
Phillippe Stark via Desire to Inspire
I'm sure that Brian and Hannah's back patio looks very similar to the one below, in which case I suggest the following outdoor treatment:
from le Chateau Les Crayeres (via notcot)
Now that we're all sold on floor-to-ceiling, let's talk pattern. Everything should match perfectly, right?
Ok, admittedly, I have a big, huge, giant soft spot in my heart for over-done pattern. Go big or go home, I say. Actually, I've never said that, but I do really love seeing every last inch of a room covered in a perfectly repeating pattern. If Brian and Hanna would like to go with something less, um, dramatic, I would like to suggest a nice chevron or stripe:
Curtain Selection by House of Mann
Yes, I know that is not a window, but isn't that fabric to die for? Yes, yes it is. It will also be a perfect save incase Brian ever gets thrown in Jail and Hannah has to make a beautiful dress from her drapes so she can go find him and beg him for money. (Wear Gloves Hannah!!!)
Oh, and look at this luxurious floor to ceiling set up:
residential project by lazzarini pickering
I need to quickly interject and provide the most important piece of wisdom to Hannah and Brian: no matter what, despite the type of curtain you choose and the height at which you choose to hang it you can never ever even consider for a moment hanging it with these:
I have just this very minute decided that I don't like them. I think it's the wimpy cord, or the wimpy litle circles... maybe if the clasps were more substantial? Oh, I don't know, they just look like they're trying to be a little too clever. Speaking of clever, here are a couple of clever things that you might like:
ASCII Curtains via Nets 2 Go
Brian has one of those techy jobs that none of his friends ever totally grasp, so, I could be REALLY REALLY wrong on this one, but Brian just might appreciate that the above curtains are made from number patterns much like a programmer would see (I'm pretty positive he's not a programmer, though) I think Hannah would like the tree, Hannah likes things that are sweet (did I tell you? she's a nurse). That curtain is like Brian and Hannah: computer-y and sweet. If that curtain told you the most insanely dry and witty joke you've ever heard, then it would be exactly like Brian and Hannah.
Man you guys must be sauced right now! Well, cover one eye and feast the other one on this:
Magnetic Curtain by Florian Kräutli via nets 2 go
Look! It's magnets! Magnets are holding that baby up. No cords or nothing. awesome.
If Brian and Hannah decide, after reading this post, that they have a complete aversion to fabric, might I suggest some lovely indoor shudders:
Mmmmm, I really just like those more and more every time I see them. Here's another non-fabric window option:
Emma Jeffs White Orba Adhesive Film available at Design Public
Just slap a sticker on it and you're good to go (note, stickers are NOT OK on walls, just windows and only under the right circumstance)
Now if Brian and Hannah are blessed enough to have windows like this, then I suggest no treatment at all:
dream photo courtesy of survive style 5's flickr photostream
Happy early weekend, kids, and good luck sleeping off those hangovers