olympic design-bot

It's official, I've been completely overtaken by the olympics. I am now a giant Karly-shaped android here to tell you about Michael Phelps' gold medal bid over and over and over again. I love the games but I really don't want to hear one more word about my boyfriend's relay race with the French swimming team. It was awesome, I got it. Here's how much the olympics have taken over my brain: did anyone notice the little costumes worn by Finland's athletes during the parade of countries during the opening ceremonies?

uh, huh. that's right. Maija Louekari for Marimekko, bitches. Of course those sportsters are a dang season late, how much cooler would those have been last year? But, we've all seen the freaky gymnasts in their scrunchies so the Finns are really doing great by olympic standards. Don't worry, this is still a design blog. Check out the dress in it's original conception:

so cute. I might choose not to squat while in the dress, but cute none-the-less. Maija is quite prolific, check out more of her fabric designs:

She's also the designer behind these Marimekko faves:

Aarre Dinnerware

Dadel Fabric, Nuppu Fabric, and Nonparelli Fabric

Some lesser-known Louekari pieces:

Tablecloth designed for the New Dining Luxury exhibition 2004

I love this, I really want to make a version for my 6 top table. My guests will hate me. ha ha.

Tree for hanging stuff taped to wall.

I've seen a few things like this around lately, I'm pretty sure ferm has a version. I'm willing to bet that Maija's electrical tape tree was one of the first.

Did I mention that the Marimekko commissioned designer who just had her prints represent an entire country in front of billions of people was born in 1982? I have to go make myself a shot and design some fabric made from my very own, very real tears.

Impress Me

Why must there be a constant celebratory parade of birthdays and barbecues and fun all summer long? Obviously I'm incapable of self-regulation because here I am, after another evening of injudicious imbibery, feeling a little... lackluster this morning. So, now I have this pathetic need for entertainment -- I want to be dazzled -- and Good God, I don't want to think very hard. Thinking hurts. Here, neato fun table!

The tattooed Yakuza coffee table from Reddish, with its coyly unmarked "feet," definitely belongs in the home of an ink-stained scenester.

I need more crazy patterned goodness... but I am never one to be impressed by the mundane. Thank you, Front Designs, for catering to my hazy whims.

UV imprinted wallpaper, for commitment-phobes everywhere, shows its pattern only in sunlight. If only tattoos worked the same way! This reminds me of my husband's college apartment that revealed strange and intricate dayglo scribble-covered walls only when viewed under black lights, of which there were many. Needless to say we moved into my apartment, beautifully decorated (to my impoverished 18-year-old mind) with the obligatory iron-barred futon, giant tacky Chinese fans, and even gianter (but FREE) Beatles poster. I can still feel skeevy Ringo's eyes tracking my movements across the room. I'm so glad I don't live there anymore.

Moving on to more of Front's awesome offerings:

Wallpaper again, this time with a pattern formed by mouse nibbles -- the roll was scanned and inverted so only the indentations showed the pattern. Ouch! Too much thinking, but how cute is that little guy? My cat would love to meet him.

And yet another brain busting surface dreamed up by Front:

The pattern here was created by bugs that chewed tracks through the wood, leaving impressions (wink, wink! nudge, nudge!) of their ways and means. This one's kind of funny to me because I spent much of my time in Hawaii desperately fighting the bugs that did this very thing to my furniture, my photographic prints, and worst of all, my negatives. I'm about to scan those negs in right now and say I MEANT TO DO THAT. It's all about intent, right?

My last ditch effort to dazzle my poor tired swollen head:

Charred furniture from Maarten Baas's Smoke series bears all the marks of its time in fiery flames. Apparently Baas burns the pieces and yanks them before they crumble to the ground, but not before little bits are broken off and cracks form in the wood. This appeals to the erstwhile gothy side of me, the side that still gets really excited when Bela Lugosi's Dead surfaces from the depths of my shuffled itunes (which are mostly rap, if you must know. I have a weakness for dirty booty jamz).

Yes, that chair is hot, but its conception is even hotter:

Fire always cheers me up.

Fall from Grace

About a month ago I promised you that I would spend the rest of my time as a design writer waxing poetic about Spanish design super star, Jaime Hayon.  Never in a million years did I ever ever foresee this post.  Let us start by reviewing a bit of his work thus far:

ok, so we're all on the same page here:  this man is an insane design genius.  (counter clock-wise from top left: The Restaurant La Terraza del Casino, Swarovski cabinet and chandelier, Prive ceiling and Green Chicken).  Since 2004 he has been collaborating with Dutch photographer, Nienke Klunder. Klunder's self portrait sequences genuinely leave me asking for more in a world otherwise completely overrun with photography series.  Ici:

From the Happiest Celebration series

This is easily the best series of photographs ever created at any Disney greater metro area.  I want to cry right along with you, sister.  Those ears are to die for!

So, after reviewing the above, one would be lead to believe that the love child of such immaculate artists could only be the purest image of perfection.  Upon hearing about new fabric line I was hoping to see the work of a 21st century Charles and Ray, instead it was a bit more John and Yoko:

WTF?  no, seriously, what. the. fuck?  Are you kidding me Jaime and Nienke?  I feel so, the emperor has no clothes.  Is this some sort of inside joke / test to all of us loyal followers to see if we really will fall for any Hobby Lobby knock-off you throw out into the world?  Well, it's not funny and I'm not falling for it.   I still love you both enough to adore every last thing in each of your personal portfolios, but this is just plain silly.  

The """colaboration""" is entitled Serious Fun and was produced for furniture manufacturer Bernhardt Design.  I understand that the artists were limited to work within the Bernhardt aesthetic, and that they wanted to create a fabric that would not just be a flash in the pan, but a bit of a flicker would have been ok, this is just plain, well, plain.  More, if you can stand it:

oh, wow, blue and red?  Maybe this really is the greatest fabric ever?!  No it's not.

Jaime and Nienke outshining their lame fabric.

If you haven't sworn off our blog forever after posting such horrid pics, and you can actually stomach more, here's what the designer's had to say for themselves:

" This textile collection for Berhardt Design aims to bring a fresh and exciting input to the fabric world. We started to create funny fresh patterns, and using colour combinations which were just a bit more daring. Colour was the key, Basta with the browns, greys, green greys, blue greys and beiges!"

There is an exclamation point after the word beiges.  beiges!  Wrong, wrong, not ok.  What does all this mean?  Fresh, funny, daring color, color was key?  As opposed to all other textile design where what I had for breakfast was key?  Oh, how revolutionary, they decided to let color be the driving force. Genius!  And the breathtaking use of blue and yellow next to each other is astounding, who ever knew that complimentary colors would compliment each other so beautifully?  Bravo!

This fabric is lamer than the selection at Rowe furniture in 2001. 

Ok everyone, am I just missing something here?  Is this like one of those 3-D mall paintings where, if I look at it long enough a satanic robot will leap out at me?  If so, I could almost begin to like this fabric but I would never ever let it in my house.