Our new kitchen floors are finally dry enough to walk on, so I was able to finish documenting this chapter of our epic kitchen renovation tale which began with a dastardly tile floor, crescendoed into a blaze of dust and fumes, and denouemented in a lazy state of vague anticipation which ended with teary eyed appreciation of The Divine Holy Grail finally within our grasp. And also we are glad that the haze of polyurethane no longer threatens to incite hallucinations (for more information, see Tuesday's post). So, without further ado, I present the illustrated and unabridged version of the chapter entitled, A New Floor Means Never Having to Say You're Sorry.
1.1 EXPOSITION
The old floors were a hideous screen printed tile which gave stomach cramps to anyone who happened to glance upon them. The mismatched grout was an eyesore unparalleled by any floor ever before seen. As mistress of the house, the tiles especially vexed me whensoever I was put upon to clean their uncommonly bilious faux marble surface.
Oh! The horror!
1.2 A SURPRISING DISCOVERY
Before the vile tile could be replaced by gleaming new wood, a very unfortunate post in the center of the bar needed to move. A sea of plywood cabinets were demolished to leave space for the work to come.
Much to Ben's surprise, when one cheaply milled, warped pine panel was removed from the post, a Budweiser beer can was found inside. Who had built this house? A tribe of beer swilling uncivilized monkeys? Ben scratched his head in earnest. Obviously he would never do such a thing.
1.3 MOVING MOUNTAINS
Moving a heavy load-bearing post should not be taken lightly, so Ben enlisted the help of his trusted friend, Mattypants, known to many in these parts as "Karly's Husband."
Matt did a fine job of moving said post four inches behind the original, by first installing the new post and then cutting the old one out. We are pleased that the ceiling still stands, and feel lucky that we will have Matt's expert assistance with upcoming kitchen projects.
1.4 A DUST STORM HITS
Once the area was prepared, yon fugly tile was removed by wondrous workers.
We were ecstatic this job was not undertaken by ourselves, as it was a particularly horrible job, which created tremendous clouds of dust.
Despite our best efforts, dust was tracked into the four corners of our house, surreptitiously appearing even in closed bedroom closets.
1.5 RESCUE
At this time, Dean Warren and his magical crew laid a sub floor of 2x4s adhered to the concrete slab by some very stinky chocolate tar. Bundles of our future wood floor were left inside to acclimate to the house.
1.6 TWO ROADS DIVERGED
Once the wood was ready, Dean stapled tongue to groove and created 151 sq ft of gorgeous goodness.
Despite the dangerously upturned nails, lack of sink and stove, and enormous mess, our hearts soared at the sudden realization that the tile was gone, never, ever to return!
And here, the plot thickens (and the wallet thins). Sensing that the road ahead was fraught with perils untold, Ben, as master of the house, put his foot down. To ensure a perfect match, he decided that the old floors must be sanded and refinished along with the new floors. As mistress, my job was to argue against this expensive proposition, but I was overruled.
1.7 BEN WINS
Even our senseless house cat can tell that Ben was right. That's all I'm gonna say about that.
1.8 HAPPINESS, AT LAST
The gleaming new floors were very difficult to photograph, but anyone can see that the new satin stain is delicious, and the marked lack of tile should uplift the hearts of all who gaze upon it.
I would not have chosen this stain color to begin with, but my hand was forced by the nearly 1300 sq ft of wood flooring already in place that I had to match. Sigh. Nevertheless, I am excited by the level of quality and the difference the new floor has made in our kitchen already.
1.9 EPILOGUE
I would like to thank Dean Warren and his crew for their honesty, professionalism, quality and service. After receiving four bids, we were pleased that the lowest bid also came with the nicest person. True to his word, the final price came in on target, and the smile never left his face. I wouldn't hesitate to recommend him to anyone in town.
I promised to give numbers for all souls brave enough to undertake this heroic journey, so here goes: the price for 151 sq ft of tile removal and haul off ($250), new sub floor materials and installation ($185), 151 sq ft of red oak ($300) and installation ($330), and 317 sq ft of sanding and finishing ($730), added up to about $1800. Ouch.
Does it hurt? Yes. We are not wealthy people! But the floors are gorgeous, and I like that our money went to a hardworking person who deserves it. In our troubled economy, it's all about helping out small businesses.
Thus ends this chapter of our adventures in kitchen renovation, but tune in to later chapters where we install cabinets! A sink!!! Countertops! And new paint! It's all DIY from here on out, but with help from multi talented Matt, everything should be smooth sailing.
To be continued...
