Playmania

Remember when the holidays were fun and awesome and filled with toys? My brother and I were so freaking excited on Christmas Eve that we staged reconnaissance missions to determine the specific nature of our gifts piled high beneath the tree. One of us (not me) may or may not have gone a bit far by actually unwrapping said gifts and PEEKING beneath the wrapping paper. I'm sure my brother will be annoyed that I'm ratting him out, but dude -- dad totally knows! It doesn't take a forensics expert to recognize that grubby fingerprints on mangled tape = one excited little brother. In an effort to recapture that sweet feeling of childish anticipation I am showering you with good time gifts today. Couldn't we all use a little more fun in our lives?

How much better is a chocolate wrench than a metal one? A lot. Just try eating a metal wrench... gross! I'm not sure these would work on real nuts and bolts, but thankfully there are chocolate versions included in the set. Yes, chocolate nuts.

Speaking of yummy treats, who knew design could be so delicious? Check out this edible version of an iconic Eames house by chocolatier, Thomas Haas. You can even see the recipe here. By the way, how does one grow up to be a chocolatier? I feel like I missed my calling.

The design savvy would also enjoy unwrapping these designer dolls by Olivia Lee. Choose from Empress of Architecture: Zaha Hadid, King of Plastic: Karim Rashid, and Chief of Ceramic: Jaime Hayon. The dolls are supposed to caricature the designers' personalities while also evoking the styles of their products. All I know is I always thought that Jaime is a cute and cuddly little dollypants.

I bet these Baby Cubs by Insurgent Wilderness Gruppo would satisfy your deep, dark bloodlust for adorable animal misfits. Eyeballs on a spit and blood spattered polar bear cubs, oh my! These dolls may be for grown up children only.

Remember how much cooler Nintendo was before the Wii? Just kidding... sort of. Get back to really basic with a lego rendering of Duckhunt. I love this inanimate tableau of lego taxidermy because those stupid ducks were hard to hit, what with their zigging and zagging. Can you tell I was never a gamer? If you can't master Duckhunt, you're kind of a loser.

If you have some extra legos left over after playing games, why not try to be a real champion? Whosoever can duplicate this bust of Freddie Mercury shall be bestowed with the title of Lego Queen (you, too, dudes).

Check out what this guy did with some blocks -- made a space invaders cutting board! You can even buy a handmade version, which they repeatedly and vehemently warn is only hand washable. I have included an illustration to reinforce their point, and also to point out that homeboy has a Linux sign over his sink. Hubby would approve.

If you ever hoped and prayed to find a Red Ryder BB gun under the tree, maybe you'll find this upgrade even more alluring. Hellz yes, that is a My Little Pony AR-15 with a purple night vision scope. Lucky Care Bear body armor sold separately.

You remember in The Christmas Story when Ralphie gets that big pink floppy eared bunny suit and, despite his abject misery, actually has to wear it? Don't do that to your kids. Sure, you might think this pea green knitted Yoda hat is cute, but will they?

On the other hand, everyone wants a knitted digestive tract. Everyone.

You know what else everyone wants? This crazy cute Monster Skin Rug by Joshua Longo. You should take a look at some of his other toothsome, deranged creatures. I would have included them, but I decided this should be a special holiday family post. Except for the chocolate nuts.

The holidays are all about spreading the love, so don't forget to include your furry friends in the gift giving process. Perhaps your feline would enjoy a collapsable cardboard Cat Playhouse. Obviously Clint is lovin' every minute of it. Oh yeah. I think I would have some Christmas claw marks if I tried to shove my half feral little buddy down the hatch, but that's just me.

Are you feeling the holiday sprit now? Feel like playing a game? Tell me about some of your favorite holiday presents and adventures. I live for your witty and incisive comments. No, really, I do.

Holiday Gift Guide: Under $500 (For High Rollaz Only)

Yesterday in Austin it was 81 degrees at noon, then snowing at midnight. My sinuses don't know whether old man winter is coming or going, but the calendar is telling me that Santa Claus is coming to town scarily soon. Thus, therefore, anon, I shall present another day of gift guide goodies, this time for all you high class big spenders.

But not so high class that you can afford to buy a diamond encrusted bling ring from anywhere other than Sears -- on sale for $299! Whoo hoo!

I have to say that this guide was crazy hard for me to put together... after all, the only thing I would spend $500 on is a bedroom set or couch from Craigslist. $500 for an unspecified gift offends my sense of frugality, so for you lucky folks with a fat wad of benjamins burning a hole in the pocket of your woolen Armani trousers, I have done my very best to choose luxurious treasures that seem worth their ponderous prices. Breathe easy -- there are no Tiffany key fobs or Hermes boxes included anywhere within this post.

You know what I think is worth spending money on? Gnomes. And if I could get that figure for under $500, I'd pay for that, too. Atilla or Napoleon gnome tables, designed by Starck for Kartell, $315 each, at Y Lighting.

In my opinion, natural fibers are always worth the extra buck (or two hundred). On left: Italian Made Washable Cashmere Blanket, king-sized for $270, at Overstock. On right: Dandy Italian-Made Cashmere Fringed Throw, $200, at Overstock. (Overstock has fantastic sheets, too.)

Did I mention that I'm really cold natured? Sorry about the sketchy pictures, but I know you have all seen these blankets splashed across the pages of glossy blogs everywhere... On the left: Alpaca Fur Blanket available in white, ivory and brown, $499, at Amazon. On right: Yves Delorme Mohair blankets, on sale for $200-$480 depending on size, Heirloom Iron Bed Company.

Yet another blanket, but I saved the best for last: LADAK "Wilhelm" Blanket made of unique recycled materials, $285 and 15% of profits will be donated to an Amsterdam shelter for the homeless, at ReForm School. Make sure you enter "2" into the quanity box and ship the extra one to me!

These Fornasetti plates from his famous "Themes and Variations" series sure beat Precious Moments figurines as great annual gifts for the savvy collector. $206 each, from Unica Home.

Or why not visit New Orleans, DC, Las Vegas and Dubai, this Christmas? notNeutral has introduced four more plates in its "City Plates" series. Hang them on the wall for cultured a mix of sculpture, art and geography. $180 for four, at Supermarket.

Actually, Karly turned me on to Supermarket as a supersource for shopping. They have an awesome assortment of carefully curated art and objects by individuals and small businesses. Case in point: Gold leafed, multi-tiered, Sweets and Desserts Tray, by Blaue Blume, $249 and totally worth it, at Supermarket. Pop-Up Forest in 18k or Silver Plate, by Melissa Borrell, $150, at Supermarket. She also has pop out snowflakes for sale.

Not to be outdone, Generate Design also has some pretty snazzy tablewares. I've had my eye on that War Bowl made of fused soldiers from the Battle of Waterloo (apparently fought between France and Britain, for those of us with holes in out historical knowledge) for months now. Since, I have a $500 imaginary budget now, I think I'll buy one for myself. War Bowl, by mosleymeetswilcox, $389, at Generate. Crazy Cast Banana Bowl -- in gold, of course! -- by Harry Allen, $119, at Generate.

My other obesession besides blankets is ceramics. Of course, I usually buy mine at thrift stores, but with a grown up budget, I'd run with the big dogs. Clockwise from top left: Vintage White Handmade German Vase, $165, at Ornaments and Objects. Blue Sixties German Vase by Horst Kerstan, $365, at Ornaments and Objects. Red Sixties Jopeko Vase, on sale for $200, at Ornaments and Objects. Blue and Gold Eighties Vase by Gerhard Liebenthron, $145 on sale for $85!, at Ornaments and Objects.

I don't have much in this gift guide for kids or gents because at this price point they all want Wiis and iPhones, but for the guy (or gal) who has an anachronist's taste for technology, these digital cameras will fit the bill nicely. And it's never to early to teach junior what a Leica is. On left: Minox Leica Mini Digital Camera with gold dust trim, $350, at Urban Outfitters. On right: Sweet-ass Rolleiflex Mini Digital Camera, $399, at Urban Outfitters. It even comes in red.

For Christmas, ice is always nice. Buy your man these cufflinks made from vintage watches and he'll always remember who loves him, because that's what Christmas is all about: cheesy sentimentality. Omega Rose Gold Cufflinks, $485, at Watch-Cufflinks.com. The ladies will appreciate this faceted cast sterling Form One Ring, $265, at La Pisette. And if you really want to wow her, slip this vintage 80's Italian necklace of silver and paste stones into her stocking. $500, at Carole Tanenbaum vintage.

Meanwhile, I'll take these beauties from Laurie Brown Jewelry, if you please. Rat Bone Necklace cast in gold, $448, at Etsy. Gold Rose Thorn earrings, $282, at Etsy. Actually, I'll take pretty much anything she makes. That lady is a jewelry genius with super style.

Does your special someone have an unsightly gap on the wall... or in their geographic knowledge? This 1957 "Asia" Junior Size Pulldown Map on canvas from Three Potato Four will surely fill the void. $250.

If you know someone who can't see the forest for the trees, give them this orginal acryclic on canvas painting of a Birch Forest, by Lisa Congdon, via Etsy.

Oh, and finally... my favorite gifts of all. BOOKS!

You are probably thinking, what the hell kind of book goes in the "Under $500" category? How about the kind that is chock full of amazing photography, probably a first edition, and definitely SIGNED BY THE ARTIST. Yep, that's right. Us plebes may never be able to afford an original print by the artists I have featured here, but maybe, just maybe, we could afford an artist-signed copy of a book. And almost certainly we could afford an unsigned copy -- just head over to Amazon and check out the price points for each edition. You could buy a whole library of amazing art for $500, or you could buy one signed copy of:

1. My Ghost, by Adam Fuss, $300. 2. Sleeping By the Mississippi, by Alec Soth, $129.95. 3. Shadow Chamber, by Roger Ballen, $155. 4. Subway, by Bruce Davidson, $350. 5. Theatres, by Hiroshi Sugimoto, $650 (yep, I went over budget...). 6. Sally Mann: Gagosian Gallery, by Sally Mann, $453. 7. After the Flood, by Robert Polidori, $375. 8. Gregory Credson, by Gregory Crewdson, $275.

But maybe reading's not your thing. Maybe you just want something flashy and easily digested. Something like this:

Yep, the 24k gold pills by Tobias Wong are back. At $429 from Generate, they come in just under budget. If you buy them for a loved one, better tell them to sell the pills for their gold content instead of ingesting them. Because that would be a waste.

Holiday Gift Guide: Nifty Under Fifty (Ok, Maybe $55)

15 days, people. Do you have your stockings stuffed and presents purchased? Or are you a big bunch of impoverished procrastinators like me? Well, hark, the herald angels are singing about all the (relatively) cheap and awesome gift ideas I'm about to post for your shopping pleasure. If your head is a swirlin' with confusion because there is just too much stuff out there, then let me clear it up for you: buy this, that and the other. Details to follow.

Need an elegant gift for a decor junkie? Any of these quirky beauties will do in a pinch. Clockwise from top left: 1. Vintage French Bedside Carafe, $50, P.O.S.H. Chicago. 2. Eva Solo Glass Bird feeder, $55, Uncrate. 3. Flavour Design Udon Noodle Bowl, $28, ReForm School. 4. Gold Mustache Key Hook, $45, benfloeter at Etsy.

Or maybe this canine du jour Porcelain Pug by ag & kb will fill the hearts of your dog lover friends with happiness. $40, available via Poppytalk Handmade.

These soft and cuddly pillows make easy gifts for people with a voracious appetite for style. Clockwise from top left: 1. Terrier in Egg Chair (!), $35, by Designer Cushions via Etsy, 2. Piebald Polo Pony, $35, by Designer Cusions via Etsy, 3. Embroidered Wolf Cushion, $35, by alisonalison via Etsy, 4. Seargant Cushion, $35, by katrinakaye via Etsy, 5. Nordic Punch Knit Pillow, $42, Urban Outfitters, 6. Out For Blood Pillow, $35, by Grand Array via Etsy.

Help your loved ones keep track of time with this hand-printed letterpress calendar that's sure to bring cheer to the new year. $40, by paperedtogether via Etsy.

Nothing says, "Welcome!" like some substantial hardware on the front door. Left: Large Ring Door Knocker in Antique Brass, $50, Restoration Hardware. Right: Vintage Lion's Head Door Knocker, $45, BIN on Ebay.

Did I mention that I'm a little obsessed with door knockers right now? These Hand of Fatima style knockers are playful but laden with historical and cultural weight. Clockwise from top left: 1. Hand Door Knocker, $42, The French House. 2. Tiny picture of Hand and Ball Door Knocker, $32.99, Creative Direction Products. 3. (another tiny picture) Hand of Fatima Moroccan Brass Door Knocker, $32.99, BIN at Ebay. 4. Door Knocker Inspiration courtesy of Never in All My Life.

These simply beautiful Dovo Stork Scissors are the perfect gift for a crafty loved one. Made in Germany, the quality is sure to please. $29.50, Quilter's Paradise.

Vintage Nesting Dolls are make charming gifts for the old and young alike. Use them as dolls, toys, or containers... hide some treasures inside. Matroyshka Doll Set, $35, White Elephant Vintage.

What would Christmas be without toys? For a fun loving individual, check out these gems: 1. Bow and Mallow Marshmallow Shooter, $29.99, Think Geek. 2. Lomography Pink Fisheye Camera, $48, Urban Outfitters. 3. Juno Cheeseburger Phone, $26, Fred Flare. 4. 3D Pig Anatomy Puzzle, $40, Unica Home.

For the kid at heart -- or even just a kid! -- Maurice Sendak's classic Where the Wild Things Are plush dolls are sure to put on a happy face. Moishe and Barnard, $40 for both, from Shop Rock Candy.

Dipping temperatures equate to a soaring lust for anything warm and fuzzy. Keep your pals under wraps with these stylin' cabled goodies. Clockwise from top left: 1. Something I had to remove from Etsy. 2. Small White Cloud, $55, by super nice fellow Austinite rosetung via Etsy. 3. Cashmere Arm Warmers, $55, by Lauren Urstadt at Intermix. 4. Blue Alpaca Cowl, $35, by rosetung via Etsy.

A little bling never hurt a thing. This one goes out to all the ladies. Clockwise from top left: 1. Brass Arrow Necklace, $30, by Loyalty and Blood via Etsy. 2. Wildlife Necklace, $34, by luxedeluxe via Etsy. 3. Sterling Silver Forget Me Knot Ring, $50, ReForm School. 4. 14kt Tiny Treat Necklace in Cupcake or Pretzel, $50, Fred Flare.

Prints by Leah Giberson are perfect for your favorite swimfan... in fact, I know someone who would love these! $30 each, via Etsy.

Christmas stories don't always end well... This print by Wilhelm Staehle from his Silhouette Masterpiece Theatre series shows what might happen to those who have been naughty instead of nice. $30 for a framed print of both images, available via The Bazaarium.

See something a special someone might like? Well, what are you still doing here?! A lot of these items are handmade and will surely sell out quickly. If you're still looking for a gift with that super awesome wow factor, tune in tomorrow to see Karly's roundup of gifts under $100. And don't forget to check out Friday's guide to gifts under a million... I know that's what you and your wallet are really waiting for.